Fooled by Randomness

18.12.15

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No matter how sophisticated our choices, how good we are at dominating the odds, randomness will have the last word.

Nassim Nicholas Taleb

TIL

8.12.15

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Today I Learned
if you die in Amsterdam without any friends or family left to attend your funeral, a poet will write a poem for you and recite it at your funeral.

Love is acceptance. Fear is denial.

8.12.15

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Erykah Badu on Love

we're mere breaths

7.11.15

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There's actually no such thing as an adult. That word is a placeholder. We never grow up. We're not supposed to. We're born and that's it. We get bigger. We live through great storms. We get soaked to the bone. We realize we're waterproof. We strive for calm. We discover what makes us feel good. We do those things over and over. We learn what doesn't feel good. We avoid those things at all cost. Sometimes we come together: huge groups in agreement. Sometimes we clap and dance. Sometimes we look like a migration of birds. We need to remind ourselves - each other - that we're mere breaths.


Micah Ling

Anna B Savage

7.11.15

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não a conhecia. depois de ouvir esta fiquei fã.

Mixtape

28.10.15

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People live.

23.10.15

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eatrip

In an age overflowing with information and infinite choices, we must find and choose our paths. There's no right answer. There are as many joys as there are tragedies and uncertainties. To simply know 'how to live' in this age is a challenge.

Eatrip (via)

happiness is not a goal

11.10.15

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It is easy to slip into self-absorption and it is equally fatal. When one becomes absorbed in himself, in his health, in his personal problems, or in the small details of daily living, he is, at the same time losing interest in other people; worse, he is losing his ties to life. From that it is an easy step to losing interest in the world and in life itself. That is the beginning of death.

(...)

Someone once asked me what I regarded as the three most important requirements for happiness. My answer was: ‘A feeling that you have been honest with yourself and those around you; a feeling that you have done the best you could both in your personal life and in your work; and the ability to love others.’

(...)

The standards by which you live must be your own standards, your own values, your own convictions in regard to what is right and wrong, what is true and false, what is important and what is trivial. When you adopt the standards and the values of someone else or a community or a pressure group, you surrender your own integrity. You become, to the extent of your surrender, less of a human being.



Eleanor Roosevelt on Happiness, Conformity, and Integrity

on perfectionism

9.10.15

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when asked if he was a perfectionist (here), Ólafur Arnalds replied:

I am, but I don't want to be. I can't deny that I am, but perfection is not necessarily a good thing. And I try to avoid it. I try to work with spontaneity, and just capturing a moment. I find that much more interesting than to work for weeks on something and making it absolutely perfect with no mistakes because… where's the humanity in that? We're not perfect, so why should our music be? All these mistakes that we make, that's where you get the real music actually.

I reeeeaalllyy want to be more like this with my art. I shall work on that!

notes to self

7.10.15

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Relationship Issues: Healthy versus Unhealthy Boundaries

Healthy: Being your own person.
Unhealthy: Feeling incomplete without the other person.

Healthy: Accepting responsibility for your own happiness.
Unhealthy: Relying on others (especially your partner) to make you happy.

Healthy: Being able to balance separateness and togetherness.
Unhealthy: Wanting either too much or too little togetherness.

Healthy: Having meaningful friendships outside the partnership.
Unhealthy: Being unable to build and maintain close friendships with others.

Healthy: Being able to see and focus on your own, and your partner’s, good points.
Unhealthy: Always focusing on your partner’s flaws and worst qualities.

Healthy: Achieving intimacy without the use of substances.
Unhealthy: Using substances to reduce your inhibitions and achieve a false sense of intimacy.

Healthy: Communicating in a way that is open and real.
Unhealthy: Playing games; being manipulative; not being willing to listen in a non-defensive way.

Healthy: Being loyal and committed to your partner.
Unhealthy: Displaying jealousy and relationship addiction; being uncommitted to your partner.

Healthy: Respecting and accepting the ways in which you and your partner are different.
Unhealthy: Blaming and criticising your partner for having different traits and qualities from you.

Healthy: Being open and asking for what you want, in a clear and unambiguous way.
Unhealthy: Being unable to ask for what you want.

Healthy: Accepting transitions and endings.
Unhealthy: Being unable to change, let go and move on.

update

5.10.15

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O Fred, da banda de folk psicadélico 17f, gostou o suficiente da minha interpretação da música Waiting para a partilhar no youtube, ainda que esta esteja incompleta.

Acontece que há 2 anos atrás eu fiz um videoclipe para a banda, e na dúvida entre 2 músicas acabei por fazer 2 versões, uma que completei e partilhei aqui, e esta que ele decidiu partilhar agora.

TIL

30.9.15

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Today I Learned
horror movie soundtracks sometimes include infrasound, which is sound below the range of human hearing. even though we can't hear it we can still feel it and infrasound has been shown to induce anxiety, heart palpitations, and shivering.

twit

27.9.15

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i was feeling pretty the other day

selfie

to let go

27.9.15

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Letting go is such a difficult thing to understand. You can't try to let go. Trying to let go is like trying not to think about something. You're just going to think about it even more. I think letting go is less of an ending of one thing and more of an acceptance of everything. It's okay that this is the way it is right now. There's no other way it's supposed to be.

Emery Allen

TIL

22.9.15

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Today I Learned
when you get a sunburn, it's not your skin cells being damaged by the sun and dying, it's your skin cells' DNA being damaged by the sun and them killing themselves so they don't turn into cancer

wide open from all the feeling

17.9.15

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You are so good. So good, you're always feeling so much. And sometimes it feels like you're gonna bust wide open from all the feeling, don't it? People like you are the best in the world, but you sure do suffer for it.


This is My Heart for You, Silas House

how do you do it?

3.9.15

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empress off, how do you do it? seriously! every track you release is an eargasm to me :]

self-taught

20.8.15

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invent yourself and then reinvent yourself,
don't swim in the same slough.
invent yourself and then reinvent yourself and
stay out of the clutches of mediocrity.

invent yourself and then reinvent yourself,
change your tone and shape so often that they can never categorize you.

reinvigorate yourself and
accept what is
but only on the terms that you have invented
and reinvented.

be self-taught.

and reinvent your life because you must;
it is your life and
its history
and the present
belong only to
you.


no leaders, please, Charles Bukowski

I am enough. You are enough.

18.8.15

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What if I told you you were enough as you are? How much yould your life change if you believed that and navigated from that truth?

Many people are not in position to grasp all of your greatness or abundance. That doesn't mean you package yourself to their consumption.

You do not exist to make sense. You are not for everybody. You weren't created to be consumed by the masses. You are you, and that's enough.

via Brittany Josephina

concealed admiration

26.7.15

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Envy is concealed admiration. A man who admires something but feels he cannot be happy surrendering himself to it, that man chooses to be envious of what he admires. He then speaks another language. In this language of his the thing he admires is said to be nothing, something stupid and humiliating and peculiar and exaggerated. Admiration is happy self-surrender, envy is unhappy self-assertion.


The Sickness Unto Death, Søren Kierkegaard

assumptions

9.7.15

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Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won't come in.

Isaac Asimov

Inspiration is for amateurs

9.7.15

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The advice I like to give young artists, or really anybody who'll listen to me, is not to wait around for inspiration. Inspiration is for amateurs; the rest of us just show up and get to work. If you wait around for the clouds to part and a bolt of lightning to strike you in the brain, you are not going to make an awful lot of work. All the best ideas come out of the process; they come out of the work itself. Inspiration is absolutely unnecessary and somehow deceptive. You feel like you need this great idea before you can get down to work, and I find that's almost never the case.


Chuck Close

you have to feel

6.7.15

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Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won't either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could.


The Painted Drum, Louise Erdrich

generate your own motivation

29.6.15

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The problem, often not discovered until late in life, is that when you look for things in life like love, meaning, motivation, it implies they are sitting behind a tree or under a rock. The most successful people in life recognize, that in life they create their own love, they manufacture their own meaning, they generate their own motivation. For me, I am driven by two main philosophies, know more today about the world than I knew yesterday. And lessen the suffering of others. You'd be surprised how far that gets you.


Neil deGrasse Tyson

Falling Lessons

26.6.15

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This short film is based on an erasure poem written by Beth Copeland. The film portrays the pain of slowly losing a loved one to the Alzheimer’s disease.


My eyes fill
with tears as I walk out the door into a memory
in the making, wondering if I’ll lose this memory
of my father when I’m old and what it will feel
like when my thoughts and feelings start falling
into a funnel, when I’m finally failing

to recognize faces of people I love, free falling
into a freeze-frame where time and memories
fade, hearing the rush of my own blood
in my ears like the flurry of two
furious wings as I fall.

(the full poem)

Attention

23.6.15

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Attention is the most concrete expression of love. What we pay attention to thrives. What we do not pay attention to withers and dies. What will you pay attention to today?

Karen Maezen Miller

Life is not a set timeline of milestones

21.6.15

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Understand that life is not a straight line. Life is not a set timeline of milestones. It is okay if you don't finish school, get married, find a job that supports you, have a family, make money, and live comfortably all by this age, or that age. It's okay if you do, as long as you understand that if you're not married by 25, or a Vice President by 30 — or even happy, for that matter — the world isn't going to condemn you. You are allowed to backtrack. You are allowed to figure out what inspires you. You are allowed time, and I think we often forget that. We choose a program right out of high school because the proper thing to do is to go straight to University. We choose a job right out of University, even if we didn't love our program, because we just invested time into it. We go to that job every morning because we feel the need to support ourselves abundantly. We take the next step, and the next step, and the next step, thinking that we are fulfilling some checklist for life, and one day we wake up depressed. We wake up stressed out. We feel pressured and don't know why. That is how you ruin your life.


via How To Ruin Your Life (Without Even Noticing That You Are)
I recommend you follow the link to read the entire article

idea vs reality

18.6.15

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soon you'll realize that many people will love the idea of you but will lack the maturity to handle the reality of you


Reyna Biddy

home

11.6.15

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Home is not where you were born;
home is where all your attempts to escape cease.


Naguib Mahfouz

bioluminescent forest

11.6.15

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Beautiful projection mapping in the forest.


you need to be

8.6.15

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Go out for a walk. It doesn't have to be a romantic walk in the park, spring at its most spectacular moment, flowers and smells and outstanding poetical imagery smoothly transferring you into another world. It doesn't have to be a walk during which you'll have multiple life epiphanies and discover meanings no other brain ever managed to encounter. Do not be afraid of spending quality time by yourself. Find meaning or don't find meaning but ‘steal’ some time and give it freely and exclusively to your own self. Opt for privacy and solitude. That doesn't make you antisocial or cause you to reject the rest of the world. But you need to breathe. And you need to be.


Albert Camus

twit

3.6.15

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how much would i have to pay someone by the hour to cuddle me in bed?
i just need you to hold me tightly in your arms, while i cry endlessly. preferably without your judgement, and in complete silence.

note to self

31.5.15

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DO IT! YES YOU CAN! JUST DO IT!

o teu lugar na família das coisas

11.5.15

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Não tens de ser bom.
Não tens de caminhar de joelhos
através do deserto durante cem milhas, em penitência.
Apenas tens de deixar que o animal suave do teu corpo
ame aquilo que ama.
Fala-me de desespero, o teu, e contar-te-ei do meu.
Entretanto, o mundo avança.
Entretanto, o sol e os seixos límpidos da chuva
atravessam as paisagens,
as pradarias e as árvores profundas,
as montanhas e os rios.
Entretanto, os gansos selvagens, altos no limpo ar azul,
regressam de novo a casa.
Quem quer que sejas, pouco importa quão solitário,
o mundo oferece-se à tua imaginação,
chama-te como os gansos selvagens, com rigor e entusiasmo
–vezes e vezes a anunciarem o teu lugar
na família das coisas.


Gansos Selvagens, Mary Oliver

o ressentimento e a mágoa

8.5.15

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Quando uma pessoa está ressentida, isso significa que se sente indignada, magoada ou ofendida. Ofendemo-nos com a ganância das outras pessoas, com a sua desonestidade, com a sua falta de integridade, com o que estão a fazer, com o que fizeram no passado, com o que disseram, com o que não conseguiram fazer, com o que deviam ou não deviam ter feito. O ego adora tudo isto. Em vez de perdoarmos a inconsciência dos outros, transformamo-la na sua identidade. Quem é que age desta maneira? A nossa inconsciência, o ego. Por vezes, a «falta» que detectamos noutra pessoa nem sequer existe. É um erro crasso de interpretação, uma projecção de uma mente condicionada para ver inimigos e para ter razão ou sentir-se superior. Outras vezes, a falta pode existir; porém, ao concentrarmos nela toda a nossa atenção, excluindo por vezes tudo o resto, amplificamo-la.


(...)

Uma mágoa é uma emoção fortemente negativa, relacionada com um acontecimento que decorreu num passado por vezes distante, e que se mantém viva através do pensamento compulsivo, recontando a história em pensamento ou em voz alta de que «o que aquela pessoa me fez» ou «o que aquela pessoa nos fez». Uma mágoa contagia igualmente outras áreas da nossa vida. Por exemplo, enquanto estamos a pensar e a sentir a nossa mágoa, a sua energia emocional negativa pode distorcer a nossa percepção de um acontecimento que está a ocorrer no presente, ou influenciar o modo como falamos ou nos comportamos em relação a alguém no presente. Uma forte mágoa é o suficiente para contaminar uma grande parte da nossa vida e para nos mantermos dominados pelo ego.



Um Novo Mundo, Eckhart Tolle

little cloud

4.5.15

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can you hear me callin in the winter light?

Mantra

29.4.15

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Vitamin D. Sunlight. Go
outside. Get a good night
of sleep. Not too good.

Not shades drawn forever
good. Not like you used to.

Open the windows.

Buy more houseplants.
Breathe. Meditate. (One day,

you will no longer be

afraid of being alone
with your thoughts.)

Exercise. Actually exercise

instead of just googling it.
Eat well. Cook for yourself.

Organize your closet, the

garage. Drink plenty of water
and repeat after me:

I am not a problem

to be solved. Repeat after me:
I am worthy I am worthy I am

neither the mistake nor

the punishment. Forget to take
vitamins. Let the houseplant die.

Eat spoonfuls of peanut butter.

Shave your head. Forget
this poem. It doesn’t matter—

there is no wrong way

to remember the grace of your
own body; no choice

that can unmake itself.

There is only now, here,
look: you are already

forgiven.




Mantra to Overcome Depression, Sierra DeMulder

this. is. so. relevant.

23.4.15

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10 Things You Should Never Say To A Depressed Person

people don't seem to understand how depression is not a choice.

There is no point treating a depressed person as though she were just feeling sad, saying, there now, hang on, you’ll get over it.
Sadness is more or less like a head cold- with patience, it passes.
Depression is like cancer.

plus (notice that from here on this is just my personal experience) if I am to share with someone I suffer from depression it means I care about that person and I want our friendship to last, and so I need that person to understand my condition and where my "moods" come from, it's not just me giving excuses. because when you care about someone you try to help them, right? but how can you help if you simple ignore their sickness and just treat it like its just some phase. well it's not.
so please, if you actually bothered to read this and you know someone with depression follow that link up there and go inform yourself. this shit is serious and is everywhere, it's like a plague.

Cleaning Pieces

21.4.15

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CLEANING PIECE I

Write down a sad memory.
Put it in a box.
Burn the box and sprinkle the ashes in the field.
You may give some ashes
to a friend who shared the sadness.

CLEANING PIECE II

Make a numbered list of sadness in your life.
Pile up stones corresponding to those numbers.
Add a stone, each time there is sadness.
Burn the list, and appreciate the mount of stones for its beauty.

Make a numbered list of happiness in your life.
Pile up stones corresponding to those numbers.
Add a stone, each time there is happiness.
Compare the mount of stones to the one of sadness.

CLEANING PIECE III

Try to say nothing negative about anybody.
a) for three days
b) for forty-five days
c) for three months

See what happens to your life.

CLEANING PIECE IV

Write down everything you fear in life.
Burn it.
Pour herbal oil with a sweet scent on the ashes.

CLEANING PIECE V

Let a list of arbitrary names come into your mind as you go to sleep.
Say “bless you” after each name.
Do this with speed, by keeping a constant rhythm,
so, in no way, you would hesitate to bless them.




Yoko Ono

fear

15.4.15

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Holding people away from you, and denying yourself love, that doesn't make you strong. If anything, it makes you weaker. Because you're doing it out of fear.

Sarah Dessen


sometimes I get the feeling that tumblr is trying to tell me something, judging by the things that show on my dashboard. sneaky.

The Darkest Truth About Love

15.4.15

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I'm not sure how I feel about this.
I love the animation, I agree with some points, but I'm not sure about the direction it took.

relearning to love my self

13.4.15

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for quite some time I've been having this weird feeling when I look at myself in the mirror, like I'm looking from the outside, like I don't belong to this body, to this realm. I can't shake the feeling of being disconnected from everything and everyone. so for the last couple of days I've been trying to feel a little more in contact with my own body, trying to feel my own weight (as Bill Murray would say). in the process I decided to post a video of myself at tumblr, and now I'm sharing a still image here as some sort of dedication to myself, and also as an attempt to make this blog a little more personal.

note to self

12.4.15

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I must change my life so that I can live it,
not wait for it.


Susan Sontag

true detective

11.4.15

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starring Colin Farrell, Vince Vaughn and Rachel McAdams.
season 2, I'm ready for ya.


numb

5.4.15

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You can spend years numbing yourself out, your fear of being hurt, rejected, even loved...but you can never numb the loneliness you traded for it.

(via)

lost

2.4.15

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i want to stay.
i want to leave.
i am three oceans away from my soul.


salt., Nayyirah Waheed

long hold

1.4.15

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looping this for the entire day

meaning

1.4.15

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And people get all fouled up because they want the world to have meaning as if it were words... As if you had a meaning, as if you were a mere word, as if you were something that could be looked up in a dictionary. You are meaning.

Alan W. Watts

helplessness

1.4.15

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The tiredness of this generation is something so much deeper than a lack of sleep; there is helplessness in the air and we confuse it for oxygen.

Michael Lottner

decisions

24.3.15

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If you obsess over whether you are making the right decision, you are basically assuming that the universe will reward you for one thing and punish you for another. The universe has no fixed agenda. Once you make any decision, it works around that decision. There is no right or wrong, only a series of possibilities that shift with each thought, feeling, and action that you experience.

Deepak Chopra

twit

23.3.15

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why can't we just blow our eyes when we cry like we blow our noses?
i don't want a runny nose the same way i don't want watery eyes. i just wanna get rid of it all at once.

A Take Away Show

23.3.15

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friendly reminder

18.3.15

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Honesty is a very expensive gift,
Don't expect it from cheap people.

Warren Buffett

How does it feel to be you?

18.3.15

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Just think now: How much do you weigh? This is a thing I like to do with myself when I get lost and I get feeling funny. How much do you weigh? Think about how much each person here weighs and try to feel that weight in your seat right now, in your bottom right now. Parts in your feet and parts in your bum. Just try to feel your own weight, in your own seat, in your own feet. Okay? So if you can feel that weight in your body, if you can come back into the most personal identification, a very personal identification, which is: I am. This is me now. Here I am, right now. This is me now. Then you don't feel like you have to leave, and be over there, or look over there. You don't feel like you have to rush off and be somewhere. There's just a wonderful sense of well-being that begins to circulate up and down, from your top to your bottom. Up and down from your top to your spine. And you feel something that makes you almost want to smile, that makes you want to feel good, that makes you want to feel like you could embrace yourself.

So, what's it like to be me? You can ask yourself, "What's it like to be me?" You know, the only way we'll ever know what it's like to be you is if you work your best at being you as often as you can, and keep reminding yourself: That's where home is.


Bill Murray (via)

we are responsible for our own fulfillment

17.3.15

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When we're incomplete, we're always searching for somebody to complete us. When, after a few years or a few months of a relationship, we find that we're still unfulfilled, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising. This can go on and on--series polygamy--until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter.


Tom Robbins

Imersão

17.3.15

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Portugal, de Norte a Sul

once hate is gone

12.3.15

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I imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hates so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain.

Notes of a Native Son, James Baldwin

What is this thing about time?

12.3.15

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He put his watch away and leaned both elbows on the bar. "Tell me," he said, "what is this thing about time? Why is it better to be late than early? People are always saying, we must wait, we must wait. What are they waiting for?"

"Well," I said, feeling myself being led by Giovanni into deep and dangerous water, "I guess people wait in order to make sure of what they feel."

"In order to make sure!" He turned again to that invisible ally and laughed again. I was beginning, perhaps, to find his phantom a little unnerving but the sound of his laughter in that airless tunnel was the most incredible sound. "It's clear that you are a true philosopher." He pointed a finger at my heart. "And when you have waited -- has it made you sure?"

For this I could simply summon no answer.




Giovanni's Room, James Baldwin

the conundrum of life

10.3.15

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Perhaps the whole root of our trouble, the human trouble, is that we will sacrifice all the beauty of our lives, will imprison ourselves in totems, taboos, crosses, blood sacrifices, steeples, mosques, races, armies, flags, nations, in order to deny the fact of death, the only fact we have.

The Fire Next Time, James Baldwin

this s*** is real.

10.3.15

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the performances are amazing. the cinematography and sound mixing are great too.
it's so nice to see something so real and honest.

can I go now?

11.2.15

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I feel unspeakably lonely. And I feel—drained. It is a blank state of mind and soul I cannot describe to you as I think it would not make any difference. Also it is a very private feeling I have—that of melting into a perpetual nervous breakdown. I am often questioning myself what I further want to do, who I further wish to be; which parts of me, exactly, are still functioning properly. No answers, darling. At all.


A Self Portrait in Letters, Anne Sexton

the nights will flame with fire

9.2.15

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If you're going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don't even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery — isolation. Isolation is the gift. All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it. And, you'll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds. And it will be better than anything else you can imagine. If you're going to try, go all the way. There is no other feeling like that. You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire. You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It's the only good fight there is.

Factotum, Charles Bukowski

the state of dissolution

7.2.15

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He learns how much of what he has taken for granted was by its own nature neither eternal nor necessary but thoroughly temporal and contingent. He learns that the solitude of the self is an irreducible dimension of human life no matter how completely that self had seemed to be contained in its social milieu. In the end, he sees each man as solitary and unsheltered before his own death. Admittedly, these are painful truths, but the most basic things are always learned with pain, since our inertia and complacent love of comfort prevents us from learning them until they are forced upon us.


Irrational Man: A Study in Existential Philosophy, William Barrett

update

6.2.15

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recentemente decidi voltar a praticar programas de modelagem 3D,
e como autoditacta que sou decidi que ia aprender a mexer no V-Ray sozinha.
após muita frustração e tentativa falhada (e uns quantos tutoriais depois) lá consegui produzir um render que me agradasse.

book cover 3d render

como capa do livro usei um design dum concurso que ganhei há uns tempos atrás (de que falei aqui)

twit

5.2.15

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coisas estranhas acontecem enquanto durmo.

ultimamente tenho ido para a cama com tampões nos ouvidos pois é a única forma de conseguir dormir no quarto ao lado de alguém com bronquite.
hoje não foi excepção. lembro-me perfeitamente de moldar a cera dos tampões e certificar-me que ficavam bem presos.
até aqui tudo bem, não fosse o acordar às 4 da manhã com a minha avó a tossir e sem tampões nos ouvidos.
o meu primeiro instinto foi de apalpar a cama toda à procura deles, que seria o sitio lógico para onde teriam desaparecido, mas nada.
quando finalmente desisto e estico a mão para acender a luz, qual não é o meu espanto quando os vejo cuidadosamente alinhados sobre a mesa de cabeceira.
devo ter ficado uns 30 segundos imóvel a olhar os tampões e a pensar como raio lá foram parar.

mais um mistério para juntar às formas estranhas como acordo a meio da noite.
começo a achar que sou sonâmbula.

kindness

5.2.15

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It is a bit embarrassing to have been concerned with the human problem all one's life and find at the end that one has no more to offer by way of advice than "Try to be a little kinder."

Aldous Huxley

another block in the head

5.2.15

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all-in-all-its-just-another-block-in-the-head

All in all it’s just another block in the head.... by Ni FONG

John saw the ruins

4.2.15

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John Cassavetes

John had a vision. He wasn't afraid, in the name of his obsession, to make a fool of himself. And if, as someone said, ‘Man is God in ruins,’ John saw the ruins, and he saw them with a clarity that the rest of us would find unbearable. But he was drawn to the God part, man's need for love, and he was always looking for a story that expressed the stupidities, weaknesses, foibles—that got in the way of that need.

Peter Falk on John Cassavetes (via)

the universe is no narrow thing

4.2.15

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(...) in this world more things exist without our knowledge than with it and the order in creation which you see is that which you have put there, like a string in a maze, so that you shall not lose your way. For existence has its own order and that no man's mind can compass, that mind itself being a fact among others.


Blood Meridian, Cormac McCarthy

just a lil while longer

1.2.15

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If you can hear the language of my sleep,
it is whispering
lonely, lonely, lonely
like a mantra, like the steady drip
of water from a leaky faucet.
I am trying to make it say your name
so that it becomes familiar with
your taste, but it's hard
when you're not here.
If you can hear the language of my sleep,
if you listen carefully, you can hear
the prayer in it,
the hallelujah, hallelujah
at 4 a.m when everything feels like an ending and I am just trying
to hold out a little while longer.
If you listen carefully, you can hear the thank you.
You can hear
the swelling of an empty ocean,
the clasped hands of a long talk
with God and my ambivalence.
This is where quiet finds its home.
This is where my poems go to die like little funerals.
This is where they go to be reborn.
Amen. Amen. Amen.


Language of Sleep, Caitlyn Siehl

dystopian anthology

1.2.15

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white bear gif

There's something not right about White Bear.

o segundo episódio da segunda temporada de Black Mirror é perturbador.

rediscovering Bjork

22.1.15

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I go for a lot of walks and I sing. That's when you find an angle on things, where it makes sense for that particular moment. It's more that feeling. In a way, I also rediscovered music, because it's so miraculous what it can do to you; when you are in a really fucked situation, it's the only thing that can save you. Nothing else will. And it does, it really does.

via THE INVISIBLE WOMAN: A CONVERSATION WITH BJÖRK

it's tough

21.1.15

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I want to support young girls who are in their 20s now and tell them: You're not just imagining things. It's tough. Everything that a guy says once, you have to say five times.

via The Invisible Woman: A Conversation with Björk

choose friends who are not just nice

9.1.15

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Everyone can be nice. It's easy, like baking brownies from a box. But niceness, like artificial sweetener, is a flavor that becomes boring, bland, all too quickly. Choose, instead, friends with a tad more spice — passionate and intense like chipotle pepper, refreshing like mint leaves, distinctive and intriguing like cinnamon. Choose the ones whose inanities, vulgarities make you laugh so hard you trickle in your pants, the ones whose philosophies challenge your own late into the night, who are worthy adversaries in thought and tongue. Choose the ones “who are mad to live, mad to talk…the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing.” Choose the ones you learn from every time, who illuminate, teach an unfamiliar way of thinking. Choose the ones that inspire you to do more, be more. Choose friends who are not just nice.

Choose Your Friends, Lilian